Sunday, November 2

Cincinnati Cincinnati Cincinnati

Last winter I got a Los Angeles visit from Rocawear, and on one early evening we took the bus out to Santa Monica. We walked over to the pier, saw a fisherman catch an octopus and some albinos unraveling cotton candy, and then got back onto the bus to go home. When the bus was in Westwood, the bus driver, who had a high and hyperactive voice, addressed one of the women on the bus.
"I'm sorry ma'am but I'm going to have to ask you to not eat on the bus."
"Why?" she whined, extending the remaining half of a Snickers bar forward.
"Because those are the rules."
The woman was extremely hurt by this and made a cell phone call. "Yeah," she yelled into the phone. "Looks like I'm gonna be late, again. I'm going to miss my transfer - because I got the slowest damn bus driver in the fucking world! Every time I have him the bus is late. EVERY TIME."

After it was clear that she had ended her phone call, the bus driver addressed her complaint. "Ma'am, bus drivers are REQUIRED to show up late to the stops. We're not allowed to be early." His voice jumped an octave. "If we're on time, we're ahead of schedule!"
"I DON'T CARE! I DON'T CARE! I DON'T CARE!" It was getting ugly. The woman pulled the chord to request the next stop, at which point it became clear that her rage was based in being asked to hold off on eating candy for less than five minutes. "I MISSED MY TRANSFER I HOPE YOU KNOW."
"Next time take an earlier bus." The bus pulled over.
"YOU'RE A FUCKING ASSHOLE," she said as she descended the bus stairs.
"So's your face!" The door shut but it sounded like the woman was still yelling at him.

Rocawear and I moved from the middle of the bus to the open handicapped seats in the front so we could tell the bus driver that we had been on his team during the whole thing. He started pleasantly talking about himself and explained that his son is on the Cincinnati Bengals for the NFL.
"He always asks me, Dad, why you still drivin' the bus? And I tell him, it keeps me occupied. But they never win. That team can-not win."
When we got to West Hollywood, we wished the bus driver a good evening and good luck on everything.

Two weeks ago, after a night of working at the Smell, I waited on Broadway for the 4 Bus, which runs from Downtown Los Angeles to Santa Monica along Santa Monica Blvd. I leaned against a pole to read some of the last pages of the 33 1/3 book by John Darnielle about the Black Sabbath album, Master of Reality. The 4 Bus came and I stepped on.
"Remember last time I saw you," chirped the bus driver, "you said you were gonna give me a kiss. Do you remember that?"
"Oh," I said, rolling my eyes with a smile, "must have been my sister. She's always getting me into trouble."
I quickly sat in the handicapped seat and then immediately placed his voice.
"You were my bus driver!" I exclaimed. "You got in a fight with a woman because she was eating on the bus-"
"Which time?"
"Like 6 months ago."
"Black lady?"
"No, I think she was white."
"People just don't understand. You can get roaches on a bus."
"Your son plays for the NFL, right?"
"Cincinnati. But they can't win. I'm going to fly out to Phoenix to see him play this week. You riding with me out to the beach tonight?"
"Nah, West Hollywood."
"What's that you're reading?"
"It's a book about Ozzy Osbourne. It's written by a musician I like, who doesn't play metal music. And it's written from the view of a 15 year old." I ommited the, "who's in a mental institution," for social reasons.

I told Terry about the coincidence, and Terry, who gambles heavily on sports, said, "That's kind of a sign. Guys who are superstitious about these things would think it was a sign."

Half a week later Terry said, "I put money on the Bengals twice and they lost both times."

Today when I walked in front of the TV and Terry said, "Cincinnati finally won," as though I hadn't forgotten about the whole thing. Very superstitious.

Kiiiii -- (The World According To) Carp And Sheep [Tide Is High cover]

34 comments:

8847 said...

果然很有意思呀....這當然要頂一頂呀 ̄﹏ ̄........................................

玉苓 said...

TAHNKS FOR YOUR SHARING~~~VERY NICE.................................................

惠蘋 said...

你要保守你的心,勝過保守一切,因為一生的果效是由心發出..................................................

RickyLeadbetter0421嘉容 said...

thank u........................................

子珠 said...

Hello~Nice to meet you~..................................................

奕玲 said...

Some people cannot see the wood for the trees.......................................................

原昆 said...

Thx ur share........................................

佩上心璇 said...

More haste, less speed...................................................

宗穎 said...

無一事而不學,無一時而不學,無一處而不學。

韋于倫成 said...

好的部落格,希望您能繼續堅持!!! ........................................

奎峰 said...

不費勞力而得者,唯貧困而已 ..................................................

SeymourZ_Reger嘉容 said...

you always know the right thing to say!............................................................

佩怡 said...

It is easier to get than to keep it.......................................................

rl64@yahoo.com.hk said...

好好充實內在,空袋子是站不起來的。 ..................................................

MinB2139 said...

Time and tide wait for no man. ............................................................

溫淑芬 said...

思想與理論,貴呼先於行動,但行動較思想或理論更高貴......................................................................

堅燕 said...

你真的很棒~謝謝分享囉~......................................................................

文群文群 said...

幸福不是一切,人還有責任。....................................................................

青卉青卉 said...

幸福不是一切,人還有責任。............................................................

懿綺懿綺 said...

走過路過~不能錯過~哈哈............................................................

芳容222許林堅林芳容儀 said...

you are the best 1..................................................................

宜欣宜欣 said...

第一次來這裡 愛上你的部落格 感謝你的分享............................................................

思翰思翰 said...

想要推動天下,先要發動自己。..................................................................

楊儀卉 said...

一時的錯誤不算什麼,錯而不改才是一生中永遠且最大的錯誤............................................................

陳佑發 said...

Share and share alike.............................................................

陳佑發 said...

愛,拆開來是心和受兩個字。用心去接受對方的一切,用心去愛對方的所有。......................................................................

黃信梅 said...

我來給你支持鼓勵~祝你事事如意~~............................................................

承蔡蔡芸 said...

Learn wisdom by the follies of others.............................................................

文岳仲君 said...

良言一句三冬暖,惡語傷人六月寒。......................................................................

王李慧萍政勳 said...

Lets cross the bridge when we come to it............................................................

峻胡邦慧v帆 said...

愛情不是慈善事業,不能隨便施捨。......................................................................

瑰潼 said...

More haste, less speed..................................................................

HKjiqi said...

享受你自己的生活,不要與他人相比。..................................................... ............

惠NorrisBradwell041花 said...

死亡是悲哀的,但活得不快樂更悲哀。............................................................